The Guestbook from June 1996

I love Dr.Pepper whick is carried by Coca- cola

I am interested in keeping you as my guestbook!!

LOL!!!!!!  I loved it!  Laughed my rear end off!  and with a rear end
 like mine! that is not only a treat, it is something I would have paid
 money for!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  giggle  THanks for the laughs!
 and the guest book!    Angel`

I think that if you were falling from a plane an your parachute wasint
 wokins....I'd have a heartyn chuckle at the irony of that situation,
 then I'd start to scream cuz I just realized that my parachute wasn't
 opening either. Then I'd make a funny sound when I hit the ground. Like
 a slut, but more like a thud, with a little crunch mixed in.

I think that if you were falling from a plane an your parachute wasn't
 working....I'd have a hearty chuckle at the irony of that situation,
 then I'd start to scream cuz I just realized that my parachute wasn't
 opening either. Then I'd make a funny sound when I hit the ground. Like
 a splut, but more like a thud, with a little crunch mixed in.
 There....all better.

Hi, I hope it's cooler where you are.  I'm roasting, it's just too damn
 hot here in Hell.  I'd turn on the air conditioning, but it's soooo
 expensive...

What the hell do I want to send a private message to you for?  I don't
 even know you two!!  By the way, thanks for the free guestbook, if
 you're responsible for that.  Just visit my homepage
 <h6>please?</h6>  Nice Site.

I'm coming back later with something more prolific.

I PERSONALLY AGREE WITH TOM AND THE FACT THAT ALL THE MOUNTAIN DEW
 MACHINES SHOULD BE HOOKED UP TOGTHER INSTEAD OF THE COKE ONES.  DO THE
 DEW EVERYBODY!

hello there! I JUST WANTED TO TELL YOU WHAT HAPPEN TO ME AND MY FRIENDS
 YESTRDAY.  WE WERE WALKING AROUND DOWNTOWN PONOKA YESTERDAY WHEN THIS
 GUY COMES OUT OF SEVEN ELEVEN HALF DRUNK AND ASKS US IF WE WANT TO SEE
 HIS ASS. WE SAID NO BUT HE MOONED US ANYWAY. WE WERE ON OUR WAY TO THE
 MOVIE WHEN HE RAN IN FRONT OF US PULLED DOWN HIS PANTS AND SHINED US
 JUMPING UP AND DOWN. THEN HE GAVE MY FRIEND A HUG AND WE
 BOLTEDSCREAMING THE WHOLE TIME.NOW I WOULD LIKE TO SING A SONG:   NAKED
 MAN!  NAKED MAN, JUMPING UP AND DOWN WE DIDN`T WANT TO SEE HIS SCRAWNY
 ASS SO WE BEAT HIM TO THE GROUND!  CATCH YOU LATER.

Love the page, darlings.  Truly gratifying to see such innovative work!
 See you in hell!

The whole world?  Isn't that a little extreme?  As if people are going
 to the bottom of the page just to read what I dunno put.  Puh - lease.
 Great page, though.  Keep up the crappy work!

WOW!!!! This is very cool, and lots of cool people have singend the book
 so i hope you go to my page its very cool but not as cool as  this one.

Interesting.......I've heard of Entertainment but this   is
 funny......getting hits by having pages on "clasic guestbook entries".
 Do not get me wrong....I like it.....

You know what scares me? We'll sit here for hours  on our computers,
 browsing absolutely nothing, in   search of a sense of.. of.. whatever,
 when we  could be doing nice constructive things like  the Peace Corps
 or something, and maybe getting  some sense of satisfaction out of it.
 Does it  bother you? Wow, I can be a hypocrite sometimes.

uhh, it's ok. but phrases like kewl, rox, and c ya l8r, are NOT out
 yet...only people that know when to use them are allowed to...  other
 than that, pretty kewl

<IMG SRC="http://tcnetlink.com/html/kewlguy/marijuan.gif">

Well... well... well... I am not worthy of makin' such a rad entry...
 but I'm always ready to try.  Heck, if it weren't for my tryin'
 abilities I wouldn't be where I am today would I? (I guess you all
 couldn't answer that very well since you dont know me, but it's true.)
 I've learned that the best way to get something you want or deserve is
 to try your dangdest and ask everyone you can think of... if 1 says
 no... move on up to the higher authority.  That's how i've made my way
 through almost everything in my life... that and the stength that the
 Lord has given mr through my faith.  I better go... I really only
 expected to let you know how much I enjoyed reading the 100 best

I have entirely too much time on my hands.

er, look at my page

Hey what can i say."By the way im sitting in the bath  with a laptop
 writing this out and "No dont touch that  "NO NO NO I SAID DONT TOUCH
 THOSE ,THERE MINE AND THERE PRIVATE  "Hey dont touch the
 laptop"bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz  *singe
 singe*ARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH

Don't ask me how it happened. Started a search for DooM, ended up going
 through someones private photoalbum, and now I'm here. Sh**.... where's
 the toilet?

I don't know... what is one supposed to write  at a page like this?

Classic huh,Classic huh,I'll have to think about
 it,mmmmm.....classic,I'm still thinking ,mmmmmm...  I just thought I
 could thank you for a great guestbook not knowing I had to THINK,Dave
 J.mmmmmm......classic,I should be able to come up with something,I am
 over 50 so I guess I'm a CLASSIC Eh,classic huhmmmmm.......

Ego Ita Confusus????            or  Veni, Vidi, Vici. Which actually
 translates to   "I came, I saw, She conquered!!!" The original
 translation was profoundly confused.

Hi I just stumbled in and I would like to say welcome to the land of
 potatoes, lobster and NOW !!!!! The Fixed Link which is the new 14
 kilometer bridge from NB to our garden in the Gulf of St Lawerence.
 Come visit us soon Keir

FOR ALL YOU TREKKIES OUT THERE MY PAGE HAS STAR TREK TRIVIA

Do you guys have no life?  You just spend you time  looking at
 guestbooks for "classic" entries?  Do you   get paid for that?

This page is pretty screwed.........I think chimps should rule the world
 and everything should taste like pork...that would be really cool. Well
 that's my view on life, but as for this page I don't really care. Bye!

Always Coca-Cola, I just wanted to tell y'all that this has been the
 best trip on the net I have ever had, thanks a lot!!:)

Gee, I could realy use another cold beer right about now . . . got to
 remember to piss in the toilet next time.

wonderful service ever!!!

You made me laugh, cry, puke, scream, and urinate just over those
 wonderfully twisted people's entries.  Hopefully I'm not nearly as
 twisted as any of them.  Or maybe I am.  Why don't you visit my site to
 find out.  Sorry perverts, no porn at this site.  Use your own
 bathroom.

Ya know, I'v never been afraid to sign someones  guestbook before. That
 was until i tripped upon  your page ;-) Im afraid im to scared to go on
 with  my signing. nevermind, ignore what i just said.   carry on, bye

See what you did to me carol.  a little message in a little place can
 have BIG results.  I'm signing in a guest book that is interesting.
 LOVE the concept of TPN

I love your Page, but I loved SOS in the chow hall during my military
 days as well!!!

I ain't classic.  I'm generation x roadkill and i'm here to make you
 misereable!

Falcom (CRACKER)

I'll make this short & sweet...  Would you like to trade links?    If
 so?    Mine is:    <P>WWW address:<P>
 http://turnpike.net/emporium/M/mkrischak/index.html  or<P>
 http://www.concentric.net/~krischak/index2.html      <P>Thnx...
 krischak@concentric.net    <P>P.S. Your site is awesome!    <p
 ALIGN=CENTER>  <IMG
 SRC="http://turnpike.net/emporium/M/mkrischak/mar2.gif"><IMG
 SRC="http://www.concentric.net/~krischak/mar2.gif">

Fishyyyy...wishyyyy...swishyyyy...tail.

A False Enchantment Can last a lifetime!!!

Kind of like the idea of having homepages.  It really make the page
 owner feels wanted.    Keep counting...  <br><a
 href="http://www.singnet.com.sg/~dizay"><img
 src="http://www.singnet.com.sg/~dizay/right_hand.gif"></a>

<h3>Hey everyone!</h3>  Classic message, huh?  Well I'm not
 into <I> CLASSICS </I> so let's just say this is something
 new.   I think it's a great idea of what you're doing.    I think it
 would be even <I> BETTER </I>   if you searched high and
 low (and got some   hardworking internet hackers to help you)   and
 found the best guestbook WRITER Of all   time!  I mean, it's not like
 this is a bad idea-it's not, it's great! But you have to constantly
 evolve!  You'd just have to find a way to track down all the
 guestbooks someone signed who you think would be a good candidate, and
 then award them the "#1 Most CLassic Guestbook

I was looking at your site and suddenly in hits me  like a sack of
 doorknobs...where the hell are the   PEZ links?!?! I'ts 12:30 am and I
 have to go to school   tomorrow and if I don't have PEZ, the almighty
 GOD  of candy I will surely be frumpy and all you do IS SIT THERE   AND
 MOCK ME. Well I see where this is headed. I know  what you're thinking!
 You think I'm crazy! WELL   LET ME TELL YOU SOMETHING, MISTER!!!...oh,
 my  Charlie Brown PEZ dispenser...let me partake in your sweetness...
 ahh yes. I feel better now. I love your site, stubby! :)

Yeah, we're gonna have the I didn't do it, but I wanna Boy.  Remember
 the last time when he was here, he tried to do something other than
 what we wanted him to do.  But we're nice people, and he bribed us with
 30 million dollars cash, George Foreman's weight in beer, and whatever
 was in the Magic Box of Fun.  That box can fit a large-screen TV in it.
 And he took us out to a steak house in Vancouver, BC.  My my my, what
 the people from BC can do.  Everyone from Hong Kong's moving there now,
 you know.  Also, we're gonna find out how to get to such exotic places
 as Bowen, Illinois, and Ruidosa, Texas with the I-80 all the way out
 Man.  Sure, our guests are strange, but at least ehy're not liberals

Don't really have anything to say, just that I   think it's rather
 pathetic to read all these   entries where people try to make it to the
 "Classic  100". They ain't funny, they ain't cray, they're  just
 stupid.

you mean the whole world is seeing what i write right now? cool.. umm hi
 mom.. dad.. brianna.. other guestbook signers :)  am i supposed to hit
 return or will this scroll automatically? oh well  i'm bored so i had a
 look through your 100 classic entries - pretty damned funny! but now
 i'm bored again, so i'm signing your guestbook. by the way, who is tom
 and paula? after i'm done signing  here i'll see if i can find their
 pages. have a look at mine it's really neat. oh, and sign my guestbook
 too cuz it's even neater. i can add color to it now so i'll be doing
 that in the next couple days.  know what i really hate? frames. they're
 just plain annoying. so everyone do me a favor and stop using frames

hmm it cut off the end. well, like i was saying, frames REALLY suck so
 everyone just stop using them.  you should all go out and get microsoft
 explorer. why? well, several reasons! M$ Internet Explorer is
 "feature-rich" - as in it has many ways of aligning text/images and
 several new tags such as bgsound.  also, MS internet explorer is
 faster. it doesn't have to load all that email/plugins crap and saves
 on system  resources. another good thing about it is that it has a
 BIGGER VIEWING AREA! i haven't actually  measured it or anything, but i
 know it's bigger! lastly, M$ internet explorer is FREE! that's right,
 100% free  of charge, with no expiration dates or limitations on use..

dammit! how come this thing won't save my text?! anyways, as i was
 saying, what's there to lose? go pick it up. i'm going to  pick it up
 myself after i'm done typing this! hey are still any winweb users out
 there? HAHAHA YOU SUCK!  get a real browser. :)  know what's really
 annoying? when the text on a page like flies over into nowhere so that
 you have to scroll  over to see it! a lot of guestbooks are that way..
 where i'll be scrolling back and forth to read each line. really  bugs
 me. almost as annoying as really busy or discolored backgrounds. kinda
 like how the little sidebar/background  found elsewhere on this site
 tends to suck in the first couple letters of every sentence. try it! go

ANYWAYS.. try it! go up and click on  "sign this guest book" - you'll
 see! that's really annoying..  well i'm off to download internet
 explorer 3.0.. thanks for letting me sign your guestbook thingy. now
 everyone has to come to my site and sign mine so get on over to
 http://www.rollanet.org/~sage and  sign it. leave your homepage and
 i'll sign yours too. kinda like in high school when we all go around
 signing eachother's yearbooks but different. hope to hear from you ppl.
 sincerely,  jon miller

Just read your top 10, they were great. When I have more time I plan on
 reading the whole 100 entries.   Also, after setting up page, will
 return to add guestbook.

For every smile you give to me a smile will be warmly returned! ; )

I like milk & honey, because sometimes   peanut-butter sticks to the top
 of my mouth. Wait,  did I say honey over peanut butter?    Green lights
 are neat!

How's my net.surfing? Send your response to http://www.byte.me.com/

I guess I'm another one of those people who get to this part and find
 they have absolutely nothing to say.  I found this place through a link
 from someone else's home page.  I was there because I am trying to get
 ideas for our own home page.  Well I didn't get any good ideas from
 their page, but I did have a good laugh or two at this page.  This
 probably won't ever be a classic, but it was fun to sign one of these
 finally.  Thanks for the opportunity.

Great Page!! Love the graphics.

In an attempt to sound well read, and not too tired,   as it is well
 beyond my bedtime.....I must say that  your guestbook is intriguing.
 The graphics catch me.  Best of luck.

Wow wow wow! This page is unbelievably, incredibly,  amazingly,
 paralysingly and magically fantastic!  Ain't I glad to have my name
 included in your  Guestbook! Hiak.

Woohoo!  I'm famous!  Tip yer hat to Cap'n Shiner!

Come and pay me a visit, yes you.  My site is sensited for your
 protection   and is in no way affiliated with the   American Red Cross.
 My world is not   for use with the Republican party.   Any resemblence
 to real persons,   living or dead, was purely meant   to be. Parental
 guidance is irrelevent   at my site.  Smoking this message   could be
 hazardous to your health.  Eating it is another matter, since it   is
 100% fat-free. Keep away from   children, sunlight, and most
 definitely keep away from OJ.    Since my world is a registered
 trademark of AT&T, no MCI friends  and family are permitted. "illegal
 Immigrants" are not responsible   for this mishap. This message does

The holy message got crucified, let it live again...    This message
 does not reflect the thoughts or opinions of either myself, my company,
 my friends, or my cat; don't quote me on that; don't quote me on
 anything. Finally, if death occurs while viewing my site, all your
 belongings will become the sole property of Microsoft. You may now
 procceed with your choice of glock and much caution...

I stole the title of your novel in progress for my  signature.  There, I
 feel much better.  Have you   thought of a rock opera?    Here's a
 word:  solipsist    Sentence:  Many solipsists may gravitate here.

I like the idea of a guestbook. It sort of keeps   tabs on who went in.
 Thanks for the tip.    Do I have to pay anything?

   I THOUGHT "I" needed a vacation.  That is until I started reading
 your "Classic 100 Guestbook".  Yall are worse off than I am.  Tell you
 what I'm going to do.  The lottery in Virginia is 5 million as of
 today.  If I win, I'll take everyone there on vacation with me.  Disney
 World would seem about right!  I be serious!  Thanks, Waddie  (Bos'n
 Mate)

RE: #1 Classic entry (veg-o-matic). I work with a  woman who used to be
 an accountant for the company  that makes those Flowbee vacuum cleaner
 hair cutters.  So there.

hello , world!! this is my first classical message...  Hurray!!!!!

heheheheheheheheheehehe.... well i dont reallly know what to say cause I
 didnt read the 100 classic thingi but i have a joke for you.....
 Doctor! Doctor! everyone keeps ignoring me .....NEXT......
 heheheheheheheheheeheheheheh si that funny or what... a friend told me
 it...well see yah!!!

<big>He||o!!!! Visit my Page!</big>

..."A garage?  Don't you mean a 'car-hole'?"

I AM A VERY VERY GOOD FAN OF YOU I HAVE SEEN EVERY  MOVIE YOU MADE THE
 BEST MOVIE YOU MADE WAS ALL OF  THEM.YOU ARE THE BEST ACTOR IN THE
 WORLD

Atleti campeon!!! Somos los mejores.  Kiko, Caminero y Pantic son los
 mejores de la liga.  Barca y Real a segunda el ano que viene!!!

"Bother" said Pooh and left. E-mail me so that we can be internet
 friends cause I don't have any right now, I am new to this internet
 stuff.  Plus only the coolest people talk to me, so come on and be
 cool. I love Elijah Wood and Jared Leto, and Jim Carrey cracks me up.
 Talk to me Baby   I am available!  Yeah Right!

I don't want no F***ing guru's! But write me anyway  maybe you'll get
 lucky and i'll write you back.

Me again just thought I'd give you my e-mail addresse this time so that
 all you you hunks can write to me .   P.S Joey you are a Fag!

Me again just thought I'd give you my e-mail addresse this time so that
 all you you hunks can write to me .   P.S Joey you are a Fag!

Yo World My name is Louie The Cowman,I'm the artist,inventor,and
 copyright owner of Cowhats,Jeans,and Overalls.You may have seen them at
 Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream.I'm sueing them for copyright infringement,just
 another of many who you don't see in the news for some strange reason.I
 really like your page but I have to Mooove on to greener pastures.Louie
 The Cowman Ent.20 Charity St.Burlington Vermont 05401 802-658-HATS
 cowman@sover.net

How do you spell procrastinate?